Hey everyone how are you doing? Wow ok, so lately I wake up at these weird times. Normally I will look up whatever scripture there is for that time. I did that and this time, I kept feeling like that was not what the message was. So opened my bible to what every page it landed on this morning and I open it to this. 1:24 This is why no form of suffering can interfere with my joy. Every suffering on your behalf is just another opportunity to reinforce that which might still be lacking (in your understanding) of the affliction of Christ on behalf of His body which is the church.
It hit me hard I was wow I keep waking up at this time. Is this what you were trying to show me. So I began to pray for the church. I started to realize in my travels and in my experience of talking with people they were not offended by talking about God they were hurt by the church. I realize when I have traveled that size in the building was getting less. and more and more I heard this person stopped going to church because of they have too much hurt.
I realized when I woke up to the fact of why I keep waking up at this time. I am not sure we look at church with the correct set of eyes. I realize I did not I looked at the church in the same expectation and eyes of how I saw God. But then When I thought about this I realized what if people were shown how to see with God's eyes of the church. I asked God how do you see the church.
I saw his eyes water up and then I heard this how do you see your children. I right then and there had my eyes fill up with tears God I love my children I do not like always what They do But I can not control what they choose all I can do is teach them right from wrong and hope for the best. But I have so much love for them that I could honestly do just about anything for them to keep them safe to show them, my love.
Then I heard this I see my Church as my body I love them They are my bride. I see them as complete I see them for what they are called to. But my eyes are with tears because the bride is hurting one another. I saw it then. We have been standing against each other instead of together. I realized we were too busy seeing with eyes of judgment we were too busy pointing out the flaws instead of the good.
Then he showed me where things were good. He showed me pictures of people helping those in need the things people were praying in secret. I realized this the one thing that drove the good was love.
Then I started to look at where the dysfunction was it is where we lacked in love. It was where we did not put love on first. it was where we judged. I do not believe it is our job to judge but to love. You see here is where I see the power in grace and love. I have watched from my own experience that even as I loved the most messed up people in society that they would blossom and become good they would change their lives sometimes it took years but I also know that when I stood with them even in their mess that they knew they were not alone.
Even in my time in the hospital, I watched those that were alone the ones that faded the quickest. I also watched people pass that in the entire time I was there they had no one see them. I realized this that health even took love. I realized it was also the church that helped me find that healing. obvious there is something important to loving one another. They say if a child does not receive the love they will die. It seems to me love is a huge key in everything we do.
Then I heard this What am I. I was taken back again you are love was my response. Then it hit me again. we always look with eyes of judgment even judging individual people in our body we will even push them away. I could then feel the pain of rejection and realized I have felt this also. And what did I do? I ran from the body.
This season has been different when I feel like running I have decided to do the opposite I realized every church has it's issues just like every family has its issues. But this is where I am supposed to be what if I stayed was my response this year. What if I fight through the feelings of rejection. And what if I dig in and create relationships and know that just as life is a process so is building the relationship. And what if I looked at my body as a family I do not always like what they do but I will love them. You see we do not choose our family it is what we are given What if your body is the place God put you in because you are a part of the package you were an important piece of the puzzle for that body. I guess what I got out of this is this we need to look with in our hearts and maybe see what we need to do individually to create a better community with one another. Blessings all hope you enjoyed my heart this morning. and my talks with God.
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